Tuesday, July 29, 2014
A woman who was carrying a bottle filled with her own urine is facing a drug possession charge after the liquid tested positive for methamphetamine, according to cops who surmised that the suspect was planning to extract traces of the drug from the bodily waste.
A 31-year-old guy in Florida went to an apartment complex on Saturday looking for someone . . . and when that person wasn't there, he tried to set the place on FIRE. But he accidentally set HIMSELF on fire. And when he stopped, dropped, and rolled, his wallet fell out. Police used that to confirm he was the arsonist, and arrested him. http://www.news-journalonline.com/article/20140726/NEWS/140729567/1040/frontpage?Title=Police-Man-captured-after-setting-fire-to-apartment-himself
A 34-year-old man in Florida bought two cans of Sam Adams at a convenience store on Thursday . . . but got angry when the clerk told him they were $3.75. He thought they should be $3. So, he pulled out a GUN and robbed the place. The cops tracked him down later that night and arrested him. http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/palm-beach/boynton-beach/fl-boynton-beer-robbery-20140728,0,7357224.story
Monday, July 28, 2014
A 28-year-old guy in Maryland had a warrant out for a probation violation, and the county police department posted his photo on Facebook. And he commented on the photo, quote, "Y'all will never catch me." They caught him the next day.
Saturday night near Comic-Con, a man driving with his kids sped up to get through a "zombie walk" and hit a 64-year-old woman with his car. She may have suffered a broken arm. Police say the man and his kids were deaf, and the kids were afraid. There are also reports that the "zombies" attacked his car and broke the windshield. No arrests were made, but police are investigating.
Three women got fed up with the sexual harassment of women who dress up at Comic-Con, and started a movement called Geeks for CONsent. They want Comic-Con to do a better job of policing the morons who make inappropriate comments, take inappropriate photos, or even GROPE women who dress up.
A 48-year-old guy in Florida was driving drunk in his pickup truck on Tuesday, rear-ended another car . . . then got out to fight the driver. But he forgot to put his truck in park . . . so when the other driver sped off, he got RUN OVER by his own truck. He wound up with a broken hand, a broken foot, and a DUI.
A 23-year-old guy in Delaware tried to rob a Pizzeria back in 2010 . . . but the employees tackled him, knocked his gun away, and held him down until the cops got there. He's serving 15 years in prison for the robbery . . . and now he's SUING the pizzeria for $260,000 because he says the employees were too rough with him.
Wednesday,july 23, 2014
Tuesday, July 22, 2014
Toyota just announced a new option in their 2015 Sienna minivan. You can get an optional MICROPHONE in the driver's seat that amplifies your voice through the speakers in the backseat . . . to make it easier to yell at your kids.
Friday, July 11, 20148
A 29-year-old guy in Kentucky was arrested for shoplifting on Tuesday. And while he was in jail, he called Domino's on his cell phone, posed as the cop who arrested him, and ordered five pizzas. A good prank . . . that got him two FELONY charges for identity theft and impersonating a cop.
Thursday, July 17, 2014
A 22-year-old guy from Michigan wanted to get his girlfriend an engagement ring, but couldn't afford it. So on Valentine's Day he went to the bank where she works and ROBBED it.
A guy in Australia just admitted he mortgaged his house so he could enlarge his MICROPENIS. He was less than 2.75 inches when fully engorged, so he had a $42,000 surgery . . . but it didn't work. http://www.9news.com.au/national/2014/07/16/12/34/i-mortgaged-my-house-to-lengthen-my-penis?mch=mobilenh&mchpost=pos1
Wednesday,Juy 16, 2014
A 49-year-old man and his wife were on a jet ski in Florida on Sunday afternoon when she confronted him . . . because she'd spotted him GETTING-IT-ON with a GUY. They started fighting, he yanked her off the jet ski, and she hit her head on it when she was falling off. He was arrested for felony domestic violence.
Marvel has decided to make the character Thor a WOMAN. And no, it's not a sidekick or a spin-off. The ACTUAL Thor is going to be female in the comic books now. http://instagram.com/marvel
A Vietnam veteran who lost both legs has been trying to get the VA to give him a new wheelchair for two years, because his keeps breaking . . . but they wouldn't. He was at a Lowe's last Monday when his chair broke AGAIN. Fortunately three employees jumped in and spent 45 minutes fixing it. http://www.silive.com/northshore/index.ssf/2014/07/good_news_lowes_employees_come.html
Headlines for Tuesday,15, 2014
A 38-year-old guy and a 27-year-old woman were busted on Saturday night in Delaware for having sex on the roof of a Chipotle. A bunch of people saw them and called the cops, but they took off. The cops tracked them down next door and arrested them on several charges, including lewdness and resisting arrest.
Monday, July 14, 2014
Friday, July 11, 2014
A 52-year-old couple in Oklahoma were getting drunk together last Thursday around 6:00 P.M., and decided to have sex outside . . . on a sidewalk in front of a CHURCH. They were arrested for lewdness and public drunkenness. http://kfor.com/2014/07/10/okc-police-two-people-naked-having-sex-on-sidewalk-in-front-church/
A 30-year-old guy camped out overnight this week to be the first person in Spokane, Washington to buy weed legally. And when the local news covered it, his boss FIRED him. But the guy says he has no regrets, and he's hoping to land his dream job . . . working at a marijuana dispensary.
According to a new study, smelling someone's BAD GAS might help prevent heart attacks, strokes, diabetes, dementia, and cancer. Hydrogen sulfide is the chemical that makes flatulence smell bad, and it also helps preserve the mitochondria in your cells . . . which keep them healthy and YOU healthy. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-2687696/Could-smelling-farts-GOOD-Potent-gas-flatulence-help-prevent-cancer-strokes-heart-attacks-claims-scientists.html
A 51-year-old woman in Florida did some HEROIN on Wednesday, and for some reason it inspired her to go out into the middle of the street . . . strip down almost naked . . . and do yoga. When the cops got there she was just in her underwear, going through a variety of yoga poses. She was arrested and is facing several drug charges. http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/naked-yoga-heroin-arrest-675432
Tuesday, July 10, 2014
A 79-year-old guy and 73-year-old woman in Florida got married back in November . . . and the honeymoon clearly ended on Monday. He thought she'd stolen his checkbook, confronted her with his gun, pistol whipped her . . . and then fired at her as she ran away. He missed . . . and was arrested for attempted murder. http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/broward/fl-hallandale-married-attempted-murder-20140708,0,2608798.story
People have been uploading video of Tuesday's World Cup BLOW-OUT between Germany and Brazil to the X-rated site PornHub.com. But they actually want it to stop. They Tweeted, quote, "Please stop uploading the game highlights to Pornhub . . . Our public humiliation category is full." http://gawker.com/pornhub-begs-users-to-stop-uploading-video-of-germany-f-1602417863
A new survey on etiquette in America found that the rudest thing people do is text during meals . . . the worst way you can break up with someone is by posting on Facebook . . . and only 64% of people have given someone the middle finger. http://www.vanityfair.com/online/daily/2014/07/etiquette-60-minutes-poll
Wednesday,Juy 9, 2013
On Saturday, a 29-year-old guy in a dress led police in Kansas on a high-speed chase . . . and only surrendered after driving in circles for 40 minutes in a soybean field, and climbing on top of his car to SURF on it.
A new study out of Italy has found that women who eat at least one or two apples a day are HORNIER than women who don't . . . and also have better sex. They think it's because the antioxidants in apples stimulate a woman's blood flow and apples have a chemical that works like a female sex hormone. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/07/08/sex-study_n_5568877.html
A woman in Missouri watched an episode of "Cold Case Files" on A&E last month, and it featured the house SHE was renting. Turns out a serial killer had tortured and killed at least 12 women inside. The St. Louis Housing Authority helped the woman get out of her lease, and she's moving out by the end of the month. http://abcnews.go.com/US/woman-found-serial-killer-lived-home-watching-tv/story?id=24467447
Tuesday, July 8, 2014
A guy in Florida called in a fake bomb threat at the electric company last week, from a pay phone outside a gas station. But before he did, he went inside to get change . . . because he didn't realize he could call 911 for free. So the security cameras got a perfect look at his face, and now the cops are tracking him down.
Back in May, the Motion Picture Association of America banned a poster for "Sin City 2" because too much of EVA GREEN'S chestal real estate was visible. And now, the MPAA is at it again.
A 34-year-old California man has been arrested for dressing up as a county fair employee and trying to recruit teenage girls for his porn business, "Big Pimpin' Inc." http://www.ktvu.com/news/news/crime-law/man-arrested-soliciting-girls-porn-industry-alamed/ngZm3/
Christine Saunders, 45, was arrested by police in Dekalb County, Ala. after she drunkenly stole a horse and rode it to a nearby store to steal merchandise. Police found the horse tied up outside with three cans of Keystone Light inside a plastic Walmart bag tied to its saddle horn. http://www.wsfa.com/story/25958917/sheriff-drunk-woman-rides-stolen-horse-to-rob-store
Monday, July 7, 2014
American Apparel was posting photos of fireworks online for the Fourth of July, but one of them was actually the explosion of the Challenger SPACE SHUTTLE. They pulled it down after people called them on it, and blamed it on, quote, "one of our international social media employees who was born after the tragedy." http://mashable.com/2014/07/04/american-apparel-challenger/
Some burglars in New York City used the Fourth of July fireworks as a cover to saw through the roof of a BANK, then drop in and rob the place. The cops are trying to track them down. http://nypost.com/2014/07/06/robbers-enter-bank-by-sawing-hole-in-roof/
A couple got married at a Doubletree Inn in South Carolina last year, and their wedding was RUINED by a guy standing in one of the hotel windows overlooking their wedding SHAKING HIS GENITALIA at them. He was arrested, but now the couple is suing the hotel for negligence and emotional distress. http://gawker.com/bride-sues-hotel-after-depraved-guest-ruins-wedding-w-1599823351
Thursday, July 3, 2014
A 56-year-old woman and 25-year-old man in Florida were drinking together a few weeks ago . . . and the woman thought it would lead to getting-it-on. When the guy turned her down, she chased him with her CANE and a KNIFE. She was arrested for felony aggravated assault. http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/denied-sex-woman-attacks-687543
Wednesday, July 2, 2014
new survey found the average woman spends $170,000 on makeup in her lifetime. That's about $300 per month, which seems high . . . but since it includes all makeup, perfume, moisturizers, and other beauty products, it might be right. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2675159/Women-spend-100-000-make-lifetime-60-say-ditch-man-without-cosmetics.html
A 48-year-old guy in Delaware flicked a lit cigarette out his car window Sunday night, but it blew back in and set his car on fire. Two people ran over and pulled him out as the car went up in flames, and saved his life . . . but he's still hospitalized with second- and third-degree burns. http://www.delawareonline.com/story/news/local/2014/06/30/tossed-cigarette-set-car-fire-officials-say/11766311/ In the 1989 sequel "Back to the Future 2", the heroes travel into the oh-so-distant future of 2015. Since that's only half a year away, you're probably wondering why some of the cool stuff they predicted still isn't in our hands.
Well, here are five that may be on the verge of coming true . . .
A 56-year-old woman in Pennsylvania was just arrested for posing as a doctor . . . so she could give men PHYSICALS. One guy finally got suspicious when she picked him up for his appointment in an old blue Ford Tempo, and the physical was at her HOUSE. She's facing several felony charges.
The average American spends $356.20 on beer each year . . . that's the seventh-most in the world. And we drink an average of 217 beers per person, per year. http://comparisons.financesonline.com/beer-prices-around-the-world-compared/
A 52-year-old guy in Utah went to his Mormon church last August and headed for his usual seat. But a guy was sitting there and saving three rows of pews. They got into an argument, and after the service they took it outside . . . where the 52-year-old punched the other guy in the face. He was just sentenced to 30 days in jail. http://www.sltrib.com/sltrib/news/58112903-78/dodge-according-assault-church.html.csp
A 43-year-old man in Michigan was arrested on Sunday night for drunk driving . . . on a snowmobile. That's right . . . he was drunk driving his snowmobile in June and crashed into a tree. He was arrested for a DUI . . . and at the time he was arrested, it was 84 degrees outside. http://thesmokinggun.com/buster/summer-snowmobile-DUI-crash-576432
Monday, June 30, 2014
A 34-year-old woman in Kansas found a spider in her house on Friday, and to get rid of it . . . she threw some towels on top of it and set them on FIRE. ÂÂÂ She wound up setting her house on fire and was arrested for aggravated arson. http://www.hutchnews.com/news/local_state_news/woman-charged-with-arson-for-setting-small-fire-to-kill/article_f9c4a13e-d162
A woman and her stepson ordered chicken nuggets at a KFC earlier this month, and when the kid bit into one, it wasn't chicken . . . KFC had accidentally deep fried a BLUE HAND TOWEL. They apologized and offered the woman a free meal. She turned them down . . . but it doesn't look like she's suing. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2670548/I-asked-wet-wipe-ridiculous-KFC-diner-horrified-son-bites-piece-chicken-finds-deep-fried-hand-wipe-inside.html
Â Two guys in Idaho were at a gas station a few weeks ago, talking about how a guy was blasting NICKELBACK. But some cops overheard them, thought they were talking about "nickel sacks" of marijuana, and got into it with them. They didn't get arrested, but there was a long conversation . . . and at one point, a cop allegedly pulled a gun on them.
A 24-year-old guy in Michigan is running for the state legislature in November . . . and he's hoping the voters will look past some felony arrests for a FETISH. He was arrested three times for breaking into cars, pulling on the spark plug wires so the engine would crank . . . and pleasuring himself to the sound. ÂÂ He says it's a fetish called CRANKING, and he's not the only one who's got it.
Tuesday, June 24, 2014
Your kids actually want to follow in your footsteps. A new survey found one out of three teenagers would love to have the same job as their parents when they grow up . . . those are the highest numbers in a century. http://would love to have the same job as their parents when they grow up . . . those are the highest numbers in a century.
A 52-year-old guy from Pennsylvania got pulled over on Saturday and fought with the cops, so they tazed him. But somehow it didn't affect him . . . he pulled the Taser barbs out of his chest, and took off in his car. When he blew a tire, he charged at the cops who were following him, and stole THEIR car. He was finally arrested later when he tried to rob a gas station. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/06/23/robert-zygarowsk-stun-gun-driving_n_5521328.html
The "perfect male celeb"—and the results will amaze you!
Read more at ONTD: http://ohnotheydidnt.livejournal.com/89151039.html#ixzz35YE87WL1
A 51-year-old guy from New Jersey met a 60-year-old couple at a bar in New York on Saturday night, and invited them on his boat for a little cruise. But the boat eventually crashed into a dock . . . because they'd started having a THREESOME. The woman broke her nose and jaw, and the 51-year-old was charged with operating a boat under the influence.
Monday, June 23rd, 2014
Back in March, two inmates in Florida were SHOT in their cell. And they claimed another inmate did it. But it turns out they shot THEMSELVES with a gun they somehow smuggled in through the mail. Police say their plan was to sue the prison for negligence and get their sentences reduced. http://wtaq.com/news/articles/2014/jun/17/florida-inmates-accused-in-foiled-shoot-and-sue-scheme/
Last month, police in France found a 12-year-old hiding in some bushes. He told them he was hiding from a KIDNAPPER, and gave a detailed description of the guy. So they were searching for him until last week, when the kid finally admitted he made the whole thing up . . . to avoid going to the DENTIST. http://www.thelocal.fr/20140620/boy-pretends-to-be-kidnapped-to-avoid-dentist
A robber tried to mug a guy in a Motel 6 parking lot in Mississippi on Friday . . . and when he pulled a gun he said, quote, "I bet you don't have one of these." But the guy DID have a gun, pulled it out, and SHOT him in the chest. The robber was hospitalized . . . and the guy who shot him isn't facing any charges. http://www.clarionledger.com/story/news/2014/06/20/jackson-apartments-shooting/11038103/
There's an app called First Derm where you send in photos of your JUNK . . . so a dermatologist can diagnose whether you've got an STD. You do it anonymously, and it costs $40. http://betabeat.com/2014/06/app-lets-you-anonymously-send-dick-pics-to-a-doctor-for-an-std-diagnosis/