Friday!!! January 30, 2015
Denver Airport: No More Pot-Themed Souvenirs
On Tuesday, a guy in Florida got pulled over for tailgating a COP. And the cop was planning to let him off with just a warning. But then he spotted a glass jar in the console that was filled with POT. So now the guy's facing charges for possession of marijuana and drug paraphernalia.
A 19-year-old former Oregon State University student was arrested on Tuesday, because she made a 31-minute video flashing her naughty parts in the school LIBRARY. It wound up on some porn websites, and she was arrested for public lewdness.
A 46-year-old guy in Phoenix just posted a Craigslist ad offering a free ticket to the Super Bowl . . . but you have to leave your WIFE with him while you're there, for some, quote, "light domination, bondage, toys, blindfolds, spanking, and more."
Thursday, January 29, 2015
-The Philadelphia Fire Department is investigating reports that firefighters are having on-duty THREESOMES at the firehouse and on the trucks. And apparently they've all involved one very friendly female firefighter. Everyone involved could be facing disciplinary action.
A 33-year-old woman was driving drunk last September and hit another car. When the cops got there, they found she was BOTTOMLESS . . . and sitting on an empty bottle of cheap whiskey. She was just charged with drunk driving and open lewdness
She said she'd only had two beers, but when the cop gave her a sobriety test . . . she
POOPED her pants. She also failed the test and was arrested for DUI.
Wednesday, January 28, 2015
A 44-year-old guy in England was busted a few years ago for having sex with a SHETLAND PONY. Witnesses saw him take the pony into the woods, and cops found him, quote, "sweating profusely and smelling strongly of horses." A test also found the horse's DNA on him . . . but he claims he was just out for a walk.
A 52-year-old guy in Tampa found his cat dead in the street earlier this month, after being hit by a car. So he buried him. But five days later, the cat showed up at his HOUSE. So either it was a ZOMBIE CAT . . . or it was initially unconscious, dug his way out of the grave, and wandered home.
Hackers took over TAYLOR SWIFT's Twitter and Instagram accounts yesterday, and threatened to post NUDE PHOTOS of her. But after Taylor got control of her accounts back, she Tweeted, quote, "Any hackers saying they have 'nudes'? Psssh you'd love that wouldn't you! Have fun Photoshopping 'cause you got NOTHING."
A 22-year-old guy from Texas posted a status update on Facebook last week that said, quote, "So, I have 16 warrants out right now. Lol they know where I'm at tho so, it must not be TOO bad." But someone forwarded it to the cops, they arrested him later that day, and he just got 51 days in jail.
"Bridesmaids" stars KRISTEN WIIG and MELISSA MCCARTHY will star in the female reboot of "Ghostbusters". They'll be backed up by current "Saturday Night Live" cast members KATE MCKINNON and LESLIE JONES
A 20-year-old guy got so drunk at a bar in Key West on Friday night that he started PEEING off a balcony . . . and onto a WAITRESS below. Luckily the bouncers tackled him and he was arrested.
Tuesday, January 27, 2015
A 29-year-old guy in Pennsylvania was applying to become a state trooper earlier this month, and accidentally revealed that he slept with an UNDERAGE GIRL four years ago. So now he's facing four counts of unlawful sexual conduct with a minor . . . and he didn't get the job.
While people in the Northeast were bracing for the blizzard yesterday, Craigslist was FLOODED with ads . . . by people looking for someone to hook UP with while they're stuck indoors. Some of the posts had headlines like "Seeking hairy man for snow play" and "Snow day cougar looking for hot cub."
Remember the 21-year-old woman from Florida who pranked everyone by saying she had THREE BREASTS? She's back in the news, because she was arrested early yesterday morning for a DUI. Her blood-alcohol level was twice the legal limit.
A 56-year-old woman was trying to fly from Nebraska back home to Florida last week, and wanted to take a puppy with her. But when she wasn't allowed to board with the puppy . . . she DROWNED it in the airport bathroom. She was arrested for felony animal cruelty and is still in jail.
Benedict Cumberbatch Referred to Black People as "Colored"
Monday, January 26, 2015
An elderly guy in California had a procedure a few years ago that required a catheter, but he had problems with it, and asked to have it removed. His insurance company rejected his request, and within a week, it had SPLIT his junk in half and ERODED it. Now he's suing his insurance company for negligence, elder abuse, and unfair business practices.
A 17-year-old guy in New York was just arrested for posting a threat against the cops A 17-year-old guy in New York was just arrested for posting a threat against the cops on Facebook . . . using only emojis. His post featured the cop emoji followed by three gun emojis. Now he's facing charges for making terroristic threats.
A new study found that having a strong social life with friends can improve your chance of living longer by 7%. But having strong connections with your family might do the OPPOSITE. It's because regular contact with your family can add stress to your life.
A 53-year-old woman in Florida knew her son's car was a big financial burden on him . . . so while he was out of town last summer, she stole the car, drove it to a secluded spot, and set it on fire. But her son figured out it was her, turned her in to the cops, and she was arrested for felony arson.
"Hangover" actor MIKE EPPS had to apologize for posting a picture of three white men picking cotton while a black man stood over them with a whip . . . and an image of MARTIN LUTHER KING JR. appeared in the sky above them, smiling. Epps captioned the picture, "I am so proud of you bro. Lol!" He said he thought it was funny and didn't mean to offend anybody. http://www.tmz.com/2015/01/23/mike-epps-racist-photo-slavery-mlk-instagram/
Friday, January 23, 2015
A guy in Germany was in court this week, suing his former landlord who had withheld $2,160 of his security deposit. The guy always peed standing up, and some of his pee splashes eventually damaged the marble tile in the bathroom, so the landlord withheld the deposit. The judge sided with the tenant though, and said he had a right to pee standing up and wasn't responsible for the floor.
A woman accused of leaving her eight-month-old baby alone in the parking lot of a Carolina-based amusement park says God and aliens told her she needed to see the park.
A middle school principal in Washington most likely saved a kid's life last month when he was having a severe asthma attack . . . and she had him use her prescription inhaler.
JENNIFER LOPEZ doesn't like that there's no term like "cougar" to describe a man who dates younger women. She says, quote, "I hate that they have a label for a woman who would date a younger guy. If a younger guy is interested in you, what's the big deal? What's the word for the man who's after younger girls? . . . "There's just a little bit of an imbalance there. Not fair."
Thursday, January 22, 2015
A 40-year-old guy was going door-to-door in Alabama on Tuesday trying to sell a tax service . . . and he did it in a giant chicken suit. A bunch of people called the cops because they thought he was scamming them . . . the cops easily tracked him down . . . and found out he had an outstanding warrant for assault. He was arrested on that warrant.
A woman just posted a story on Reddit about her neighbor confronting her Monday morning over LOUD SEX . . . that forced him into the "birds and bees" talk with his eight-year-old daughter. Only it turned out it wasn't loud sex . . . it was the woman screaming, "Eff me!" over and over during a game of "Mario Kart" with her husband. She apologized for her filthy mouth. http://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/comments/2t1qtm/tifu_by_being_too_damn_loud
/David Vanzo of Plymouth, Minnesota is under investigation right now for allegedly trying to pull a "Weekend at Bernie's" with his own mother. http://www.myfoxtwincities.com/story/27899010/did-plymouth-man-take-his-dead-mom-into-bank-to-make-cash-withdrawal
WWE superstar TRIPLE H is one of the top villains in pro wrestling. But during "Monday Night Raw" this week, he broke character to console a young fan who started CRYING. http://www.news.com.au/sport/more-sports/wwe-tough-man-triple-h-shows-soft-side-after-young-fan-bursts-into-tears/story-fndukor0-1227191677361
Marilyn Manson and Courtney Love Are Awkward Around Each Other . . . Because They Haven't Had Sex? http://www.eonline.com/news/617011/courtney-love-fires-back-at-marilyn-manson-after-rocker-claims-she-slept-with-all-his-friends-but-he-wasn-t-interested
The Most Dangerous Sex Position for a Man is "Woman on Top"
Women Are Nine Times More Likely to Want a Geek Husband Than a Jock Husband.
Wednesday, January 21, 2015
Nabisco just announced they're rolling out a brand new line of Oreos for Valentine's Day this year . . . Red Velvet Oreos with red cookies and cream cheese filling. The red cookies are only the third color of cookies in Oreo history . . . they started with brown chocolate cookies in 1912 and introduced golden vanilla cookies in 2004.
When JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE's New York City restaurant Destino closed in 2013, it wasn't just due to flooding, as had been reported. A new lawsuit reveals that sewage pipes burst, drenching the place in HUMAN WASTE, and ultimately leading to a mold problem. The restaurant's insurance company denied the owners' claims, including $275,000 for repair and unspecified business losses.
The subject of the next Comedy Central roast will be JUSTIN BIEBER. And he not only agreed to it . . . it was HIS IDEA. A Comedy Central executive joked, quote, "[He's] been asking us for a few years to roast him. We just kept telling him to go create more source material first. We're thrilled he listened." The roast will tape next month and air later this year. http://pagesix.com/2015/01/20/justin-timberlakes-nyc-restaurant-forced-out-of-business-by-bad-plumbing/
There's an 86-year-old woman from Florida who's been living on a luxury cruise ship for almost SEVEN years . . . and spending about $164,000-a-year to do it. The cruise line says she's one of FOUR women living full time on their ships . . . but she's been there the longest.
There's an 86-year-old woman from Florida who's been living on a luxury cruise ship for almost SEVEN years . . . and spending about $164,000-a-year to do it. The cruise line says she's one of FOUR women living full time on their ships . . . but she's been there the longest. http://www.businessinsider.com/rich-people-who-lost-their-money-2015-1?op=1
Tuesday, January 20, 2015
SETH ROGEN caught some heat for comparing the movie "American Sniper" to a German propaganda film. Country singer and army veteran CRAIG MORGAN kindly invited him to LEAVE THE COUNTRY. Meanwhile, MICHAEL MOORE caused controversy by calling snipers "cowards".
The new film Selma avoided quoting Martin Luther King's civil-rights speeches because his family owns the copyrights and has sued over them—and it's all perfectly legal. http://www.newser.com/story/201487/why-mlks-estate-files-lawsuits-over-the-dream.html
A five-year-old kid in England skipped a friend's birthday party at a ski resort a few weeks ago . . . so the mom throwing the birthday sent him an INVOICE for the $24 she had to pay to cover him when he no-showed. She even threatened legal action if the money wasn't paid. http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-cornwall-30876360
A beauty expert in England says the key to perfect skin is . . . rubbing your own PEE on your face. It's anti-bacterial, anti-fungal, and filled with vitamins and minerals. Some women who buy into that have even started mixing it in with their moisturizer. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2916607/Is-URINE-secret-flawless-complexion.html
Friday!!!! January 16, 2015
On Sunday, a guy in Fort Myers, Florida got caught with a prostitute, because they got-it-on in his car . . . while it was parked next to a PRE-SCHOOL. When police ordered him out of his car, he was still fully aroused. Luckily, it was Sunday so there weren't any kids around.
A 38-year-old guy and 30-year-old guy in Florida got into a police chase on Wednesday and wanted to get rid of their COCAINE . . . so the 30-year-old threw the bag out of the sunroof. And . . . it landed RIGHT on the hood of the cop car. The guys eventually pulled over and were arrested on a bunch of charges. http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/florida/flying-cocaine-arrest-897541
This Year's Oscar Nominees Are Led By "Birdman", "The Grand Budapest Hotel", and a Cinematographer Named Dick Poop. http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/2015/01/15/evening-news-roundup-thursday/21799739/
Even skinny girls like to get high. At least that's what Bethenny Frankel is banking on, as the reality star plans to launch a line of "Skinnygirl marijuana" in Alaska, Colorado, Oregon and Washington, where it's legal. http://www.usmagazine.com/celebrity-news/news/bethenny-frankel-planning-to-launch-skinnygirl-marijuana-2015151#ixzz3OvdXooW2
A 32-year-old guy in Pennsylvania robbed a bank on Wednesday, then took off running . . . and stopped to eat some chicken and biscuits at a restaurant two blocks away. As the cops searched for him, they popped into the restaurant to check its surveillance camera . . . and saw him sitting there eating. He was arrested about 20 minutes after robbing the bank.
Thursday, January 15, 2015
A 23-year-old guy in Florida got into bed Sunday . . . and found someone had changed his sheets. Instead of being GRATEFUL, he was enraged for some reason . . . stormed into his brother's room . . . and ATTACKED. His brother got away and called the cops . . . the guy was arrested for aggravated assault.
A 24-year-old woman in Massachusetts went to a police station a few weeks ago . . . and started throwing BACON and SAUSAGES at an officer behind a window. As she was being arrested, she said, quote, "I'm here to feed the pigs." Why would you feed pigs pork products? I don't know. She was arrested for disorderly conduct and destruction of property . . . and will have a psych evaluation. http://www.metrowestdailynews.com/section?template=videodetail&vid=3987136234001&vidtitle=VIDEO:%20S
A 77-year-old man in China was furious at a bus driver back in October for not stopping precisely at the bus stop . . . he'd stop a few feet before or past it. So the guy brought an OLD GRENADE on the bus, pulled the pin, and threw it. Fortunately, it was defective and didn't explode . . . the guy was on trial this week and pled guilty to using an explosive device. http://www.scmp.com/news/china-insider/article/1679012/grenade-attack-zhejiang-bus-fails-after-explosive-flop
Wednesday, January 14, 2015
There's a new website that ships an envelope full of GLITTER to your enemies. It doesn't sound awful on the surface, but the thing is stuffed with glitter . . . so when they open it, it will spill, which should lead to some annoying clean up. It costs $10 to ship glitter anywhere in the world.
There's waking up hungry and there's, well, this. A British cafe has introduced the queen of all breakfasts, a 59-item spread that packs in 7,778 calories. http://www.newser.com/story/196571/to-eat-this-8k-calorie-breakfast-sign-a-waiver.html
A 35-year-old guy in England was busted for selling tourists fake bottles of Jack Daniel's. It turns out he was just selling water . . . colored with human PEE and POOP. He was given a suspended sentence of 70 days in jail for fraud. http://www.blackpoolgazette.co.uk/news/crime/blackpool-conman-sold-urine-as-whiskey-1-7042329
In hopes of getting some revenge for the Charlie Hebdo terrorist attacks in France, the Anonymous group of hackers are going after Al Qaeda.
A man who claims to have a rare condition known as diphallia – which means he has two working penises – has written a book about life with his unusual anatomy. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/men/the-filter/11321508/Man-with-two-penises-writes-tell-all-memoir.html
The president of the Discovery Channel says the network is THROUGH with those FAKE documentaries about things like mermaids and giant prehistoric sharks.A guy traveling from Hong Kong to China was busted with 94 iPhones strapped to his body . . . because he walked through a metal detector. Apparently he hadn't counted on that, and was arrested for smuggling. http://www.theverge.com/2015/1/12/7530919/iphone-smuggling-china-border
A dating website surveyed 145,000 American men to find the traits that make up the "perfect" woman. The top six traits men value most are: Blonde hair . . . blue eyes . . . a slender body . . . not smoking . . . social drinking . . . and a graduate degree. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2907365/America-s-men-perfect-woman-blonde-blue-eyes-graduate-degree.html
A woman in Australia just listed her husband's Porsche for $16,000 . . . even though it's probably worth about six times that. But she's selling it for REVENGE . . . after she caught him cheating on her after 25 years of marriage. http://www.news.com.au/technology/online/melbourne-wife-gets-revenge-on-cheating-husband-by-selling-his-porsche-for-20000/story-fnjwnhzf-1227182531211
There's a new website that ships an envelope full of GLITTER to your enemies. It doesn't sound awful on the surface, but the thing is stuffed with glitter . . . so when they open it, it will spill, which should lead to some annoying clean up. It costs $10 to ship glitter anywhere in the world. http://shipyourenemiesglitter.com/
Monday, January 12, 2015
A 40-year-old guy in North Dakota and his wife were playing Yahtzee DRUNK a few weeks ago, and got into a physical fight. So the guy told his nine-year-old son to call 911 . . . and threatened to KILL him if he didn't. He was charged with felony terrorizing.
Arsonists struck a German tabloid on Sunday that reprinted controversial cartoons from the Charlie Hebdo magazine, which was attacked by terrorists last week in Paris. http://www.inforum.com/news/crime/3651572-mayville-man-accused-threatening-kill-son-dispute-wife-over-yahtzee
A new study found the key to getting a second date with someone is . . . to order DESSERT. The brain has similar reactions to eating something sweet and falling in love . . . so eating dessert can activate those romantic feelings. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/science/science-news/11337140/Sweet-love-how-ordering-pudding-can-ignite-the-flames-of-passion.html
U.S. Customs and Border Protection officers in Vermont say they found a hollowed out loaf of bread stuffed with drugs inside a Florida man's car. http://www.wcax.com/story/27784844/border-officers-man-had-loaf-of-bread-stuffed-with-drugs
Friday, January 9, 2015
A Florida couple was arrested early yesterday after they were spotted having sex atop a 2004 Kia Sedona at a West Palm Beach auto dealership, police report.
A woman in San Diego was about to use her office bathroom on Tuesday, when she noticed the water level in the toilet was high. So she plunged it . . . and a GIANT SNAKE popped out. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/01/07/snake-in-san-diego-toilet_n_6433110.html?utm_hp_ref=weird-news
BILL COSBY made a RAPE JOKE during a show in Canada last night. A woman in the front row got up, and Bill asked her where she was going. http://jezebel.com/cosby-makes-rape-joke-you-have-to-be-careful-drinking-1678409984
Thursday, January 6, 2015
PARIS TERRORISM: One Suspect Surrenders, World Shows Its Support
Wednesday, January 7, 2015
Two guys in their twenties had to attend a court-ordered DUI class in California on Monday, and they got into an argument afterward. It escalated, and one guy stabbed the other with a SWITCHBLADE. He was arrested for assault with a deadly weapon.
A man in England was dumped by his fiancée ... but that doesn't mean he wants his honeymoon to the Dominican Republic go to waste. http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/11325318/Jilted-boyfriend-puts-honeymoon-on-eBay-after-fiancee-dumped-him.html
A Danish brewery has created a new beer that helps you be more CREATIVE. Studies have found that a blood-alcohol level of .075 is ideal for creativity . . . so the beer has marks on the bottle that show you exactly how much you should drink to get to .075, based on your weight. http://firstwefeast.com/drink/the-problem-solver-is-a-beer-meant-to-help-you-be-more-creative/
Sony Is Bringing Back the Walkman With One Huge Surprise. http://Sony Is Bringing Back the Walkman With One Huge Surprise
Tuesday, January 6, 2015
You Can Now Buy Shoes With Hidden Compartments For Mini Liquor Bottles!
More and more cities are banning SLEDDING, because they think it's too dangerous. And too risky . . . not just for kids, but for lawsuits. http://abcnews.go.com/US/wireStory/liability-concerns-prompt-cities-limit-sledding-27988639?singlePage=true
A Florida man was arrested for a bizarre incident in which he assaulted employees of his pet store – by slapping them with a lizard! http://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime/fla-reptile-store-owner-smacked-employee-lizard-cops-article-1.2066355
Monday, January 5, 2015
A 19-year-old guy went to the Rose Bowl in California on New Year's Day, got drunk, and didn't have a way to get to his car a few miles away after the game. So he stole one of the Rose Bowl's golf carts, and drove it on the HIGHWAY to get his car. The cops pulled him over and he was arrested for a DUI.
A 22-year-old in Florida went into a CVS last week . . . stole some dog beds . . . took them into the bathroom . . . stripped naked . . . and SLEPT on them. He was arrested for retail theft and lewd or lascivious exhibition. http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/crime/naked-dog-bed-defiler-897541
A Guy Trashes His Girlfriend's Car After She Describes a Sex Dream About Him and His Grandma? http://offthebeat.blogs.tcpalm.com/2014/12/30/1051/
A guy in England recently noticed his goldfish was acting funny, and took him to a vet . . . who told him the fish was CONSTIPATED and would need a $459 surgery to clear the blockage. The surgery took one hour, and was a success. http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-norfolk-30655444
Friday, January 2, 2015
Actor EDWARD HERRMANN died Wednesday after a battle with brain cancer. He was 71. Herrmann is best known for playing LAUREN GRAHAM's father on "Gilmore Girls", and Max, the lead vampire, in "The Lost Boys".
A 33-year-old guy in Missouri got into an argument with his wife on Christmas Day . . . grabbed the cardboard tube of WRAPPING PAPER . . . and CHOKED her with it. He was arrested and charged with felony domestic assault. http://www.thesmokinggun.com/buster/man-choked-wife-with-wrapping-paper-roll-687432
Bangbros Exploits "I Can't Breathe" In Latest Depressing Porn Video http://gawker.com/bangbros-exploits-i-cant-breathe-in-latest-depressing-1676866997
According to the Consumer Product Safety Commission, here are some of the weirdest groin injuries that sent guys to the ER last year: Serious rug burns from grinding too hard at a club . . . a guy who closed his laptop on his junk . . . and a guy who accidentally got kicked in the groin by someone who was ICE SKATING. http://theconcourse.deadspin.com/what-horrible-things-did-we-do-to-our-penises-last-year-1673944688/+barryap
OLDSMAR, FL (CNN) - A man was accused of cutting his mom's head off with an ax on New Year's Eve because he was upset about putting boxes away in the attic. http://www.foxcarolina.com/story/27743875/police-fl-man-cuts-moms-head-off-to-keep-from-doing-chores
A 19-year-old woman in Florida got into a fight with her boyfriend last weekend because he was talking to another girl, and threw a box of CONDOMS at him. It hit him in the eye and left a bruise . . . but she told the cops it was because he slapped her. The cops couldn't figure out who instigated things, so they were both arrested. http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/boyfriend-assaulted-with-box-of-condoms-687543
A couple in New York has been fighting with a neighbor over a driveway that encroached onto their property, so they put up a ton of cameras trying to catch him doing something illegal, and followed him around wearing body cameras. But when they took their videos to the county district attorney's office . . . THEY were arrested for stalking. http://abcnews.go.com/US/ny-couple-complained-neighbor-arrested/story?id=27902603
On Saturday, a guy in Pennsylvania tried to rob a pizza place, and handed one of the workers a hold-up note written on toilet paper. But police ended up matching it to the roll in his bathroom . . . there were still indentations on the roll that matched what the note said, and a pen was sitting next to it.
Friday, November 21, 2014
Four women came out yesterday with new accusations against BILL COSBY. LOU FERRIGNO's wife says he tried to assault her at his house in 1967, but she got away. An actress from "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest" says Bill forced himself on her in the green room of "The Tonight Show" in 1971. And a nurse from Florida and a woman from Pittsburgh say he drugged and assaulted them.
A 34-year-old guy in England tried to rob a grocery store last week by whipping out a PICTURE of a gun. The employees weren't particularly intimidated and stalled the guy while they called the cops, and he was arrested. http://www.cambridge-news.co.uk/Staff-Tesco-near-Cambridge-receive-threats-kill/story-24553983-detail/story.html
A 43-year-old janitor in Iowa was cleaning a public library a few weeks ago, and stopped to look at PORN on one of their computers. But then he panicked . . . and wound up STEALING the computer and destroying it. The police easily traced it back to him, and he's been charged with theft. http://www.kcrg.com/subject/news/public-safety/crime/police-say-coralville-man-stole-computer-from-library-then-destroyed-it-20141121
A couple in Springfield, Oregon left a strip club around 5:45 P.M. on Sunday, and started getting-it-on in their car . . . in plain view of passing cars, while parked directly in front of the local JAIL. They're both facing charges for indecent exposure and disorderly conduct. http://www.kval.com/news/local/Police-Couple-had-sex-in-car-parked-outside-jail-282953351.html
Thursday, November 13,2014
The FBI busted America's most wanted cybercriminal a few years ago, then had the challenge of decrypting his hard drive. And they managed to break in by guessing his password . . . because it was his CAT'S name. He's in prison until 2020.
Probe That Landed on Comet May Not Be ecure. http://www.newser.com/story/198574/probe-that-landed-on-comet-may-not-be-secure.htm